We are in the thick of Coronamageddon now. We’ve all been feeling a lot of feelings and having to deal with those feelings and the real changes that this virus has brought to our lives. The real fears that it’s brought to our lives. Let’s sum up some of it to start.
This virus was like a huge boulder rolling down a very long, gentle slope. We all should have seen it coming, but how much did any of us do about it? How much did our “leaders” do? A lot of people didn’t see it at all. A lot of the people who did see it tried to downplay it. “That’s not a boulder. It’s just a little pebble. You’ll see when it gets closer. Nothing to worry about.” Other people who could see the boulder for what it was must have been paralyzed by the enormity of it and were just stuck, unable to act. Or maybe they thought they could wish it away and hope that gravity would stop working and the boulder would just stop rolling toward us.
All of this has made me feel a lot of frustration and anger. Apparently, our “leaders” got an early warning about this virus. I haven’t looked too deeply into this but sounds like all they did was pull their money out of the stock market but did’t do much else to help prepare us for what was about to happen.
My anger and frustration continued once we did start doing something. I still have to work and I’ve seen all the people still out in public and often they’re not out for good reasons. I’ve been like a fucking yo-yo feeling frustrated and angry then calming down then frustrated and angry again over and over. It hasn’t felt good.
Some of us are feeling scared, anxious, worried and all sorts of other unpleasant emotions. Worried for loved ones or maybe just worried and sad for all the other people that you don’t even know that are going to die from this virus. Perhaps terror is not too strong a word to describe how some people are feeling.
Those of you who have lost jobs have real money issues to add to your worry and anxiety. Some of you who are working at home might still be worried about how long it will be before your job is back to normal or if it ever will be.
The uncertainty makes these feelings difficult to pass through. We don’t know when this will end. We don’t know who will get sick. We don’t know if we do get sick if we’ll be one of the lucky people, who don’t even know they’re sick, or if we’ll be less fortunate. There are young, healthy people succumbing to this virus.
These are real fears. It is normal and rational to feel these feelings. If you haven’t been taking care of yourself the way you’re used to, I get it. If you’ve been drinking more or eating more or sleeping more or whatever, I get it. If it feels like you’ve been operating inside a lingering fog and you just haven’t been quite as sharp as you’re used to, I get it.
But I’m not writing this to commiserate. I’ve started here to acknowledge where we are, to admit the seriousness of our situation, to confirm that your feelings are justified. But this is a CALL TO ACTION.
Everything we encounter in our lives is an opportunity. Some events are so extreme that finding the opportunity and trying to look at it that way may truly be unreasonable, but Coronamageddon, for most of us, is not one of those situations. How often have you wished that you could have more time at home with your family? How often have you thought that your life and your children’s lives are over-scheduled yet you still couldn’t cross any appointments off your calendar? How long is the list of projects you have to do around your home? How many times have you not started exercising or meditating or going to bed earlier because you just couldn’t find the time to make it happen?
I’ve already written about all the feelings this virus is bringing up for us and I’ve agreed with you that these feelings are justified. It’s been a few weeks now and we don’t know how much longer this will go on. I challenge you to accept and move on.
STOP.
I am NOT suggesting that you should leave your house and start hanging out with all your friends again and giving everyone hugs and kisses. EVERYONE SHOULD STILL STAY THE FUCK AT HOME!
I am challenging you to accept what this means for your life right now and to start living again. We do not live in the past or in the future. Our entire life is in this moment and right now this is what our life is defined by. So are you going to live or are you going to get stuck in all these feelings and fears and just keep giving yourself excuses to wait for things to “get back to normal”.
There are plenty of things to do at home. Plenty of ways to make yourself feel better. Plenty of ways to feel like you’re actually living instead of just waiting this thing out. You can come out of this as a better version of yourself, who has embraced this moment that you can not control, or you can come out of it with your only great accomplishment being a new ass-shaped dent in your couch.
YOU GET TO CHOOSE. This does not mean that you ignore your feelings of worry and fear. This means you acknowledge these feelings and you keep living.
There are ways that we can act from home to impact the larger world around us too. Many of us were already concerned about so many of the larger scale issues that are now having light shined on them. Did you already think our health care system needed improving? Did you already realize that the American worship of capitalism was great for the few on the top of the pile but pretty shitty for the rest of us? It looks more like a modern feudal system than an open opportunity for all to succeed, doesn’t it? Were you already unhappy with the way our government was handling environmental issues?
I have good news for you! You have a lot more available time now to shoot an email or write a letter or make a call to your Senators and Representatives. In between binge-watching Netflix, home-schooling your kids, and doing yoga on Zoom, you can get in touch with your elected officials and make sure they know what your priorities are.
As long as we are alive, we should keep living. The dead can’t dance but we can. If you are living in fear that’s ok, but keep living. Don’t let all of this paralyze you. Live your life!